Ranting & Retail Therapy - Halloween Clearance 2023

I trick-or-treated-myself to clearance candy. A LOT of clearance candy. Even by my standards.

Originally I wanted to find some pillows and décor, but it was slim pickin's. That's what you get when Christmas items roll out on October 1st. (RIP Thanksgiving, you're problematic, but I love your food.)

Upon reflection, Christmas isn't to blame. (Although I will make angry Instagram Reels about winter products encroaching upon my spooky season.) No matter what seasonal-flavor you subscribe to, it's all the same consumerism, and our consumer-clock is completely out of whack. 

Back to school sales were popping up as early as June, when some kids were still in school. Halloween was rolling out in July. Christmas by the end of September. Forget Daylight Savings, this is what needs adjusting! Sticking with a Christmas metaphor, we're opening our gifts too early. By the time the actual event rolls around, we're celebration-fatigued and the magic is gone.

How do we get it back? At some point, will we skew so far that we loop back into appropriate seasonal time frames?  Like when something is so lame it's cool? Probably not. And I definitely can't control when the Pumpkin Spice Lattes or Mariah Carey anthems hit the masses. 

Spotting skeletons on shelves in July is bittersweet. I'm spooky-season through-and-through but I also love summer, and if I want the "good" Halloween stuff, I need to grab it before the end of August or I'll have nothing come October! The justified fear of missing out because I didn't conform to accelerated consumption stops me from attempting a more appropriate self-imposed timeline.

I am but one little blogger in a sea of nonsense on the internet, and I am screaming into the void, "let us savor our seasons!" But I don't know how to make it stop.  

Dramatics aside...here's what I bought on the clearance racks this year. 

Confectionary Fright-Flight? - Seasonal Sampler of Cotton Candy

Fun Sweets Seasonal Sampler - Walmart

A flight of seasonal cotton candy! What a great concept! 

Years of blogging has taught me that less is more. (As long as the price is right.) Buying entire packages of wacky flavored chips or cookies can be so wasteful. If limited edition flavors are released in smaller serving sizes, that's the way to go. That said, tiny tubs of novelty flavored cotton candy sounds absolutely perfect to me! 

Even though I've already tried and reviewed two of these flavors, the S'more and Candy Corn, I couldn't resist the idea of cranberry cotton candy. I pretty much bought this entire set just for that flavor alone. A wise decision?  We'll see...

Baby's First Liquid Death - Berry it Alive

Liquid Death canned water sounds like it's ripped from an episode of Metalocalypse, but it's legit! And it's actually been around for a while. 

You'd think I would have gotten into this stuff a lot sooner, what with it being covered in skulls and having the tag line, "murder your thirst." Completely my aesthetic, and yet, I never got around to it. 

Then, last night, I was at Walmart grabbing seasonal cat treats (because I'm that kind of pet-mom), when I spotted an 8-pack of "Berry It Alive," on the discounted food end-cap. I figured, what better time to drink Liquid Death than in the midst of Spooky Season? Plus, it's discounted! (Not sure why, but it was only $7.00, a bad omen?) 

So, let's find out if this is...to die for? 

Grim is back! - Voo-Dew Year 5 (+ Actual Flavor Reveal)

Voo-Dew 2023

Mystery Voo-Dew has once again graced us with it's ghastly presence, and I could not be happier. 

In a world where McDonald's releases sub-par Boo-Buckets with mock-lids, Burger King releases a spooky bucket only available in 5 locations, and stores roll out their Christmas wares on October 1st... Mtn Dew is a spooky-season beacon of hope. This year marks it's 5th anniversary, and I hope it stays a seasonal tradition for years to come. 

So, what has the reaper bottled for us this year? Previously, the labels and their coloring offered us a hint. 

Halloween 2022 Recap - Clearance and all!

How did you spend your actual Halloween? 

Sadly, I had to work, but I wore my favorite Ghostbusters shirt, wore orange eye make-up, my skull-face mask, brought a bowl of candy, and played Halloween songs. But, before heading out, I set-up a bowl on candy on my stoop for kids. Trick or Treating started at 3, but it was a weekday, so I wasn't able to get home until after 5. I decorated the house and didn't want to deprive any kids from candy, so I figured, that should work, BUT I used a disposable paper party bowl from Dollar Tree. (Friends who did the same had their whole bowl stolen and I like my Halloween candy bowl.)

When I got back...

Pin-pointing 2022 Voo-Dew's Flavor

Hello, I just woke up from an unplanned post-work couch-nap and now I'm about to drink a bottle of Mystery Mountain Dew at 11:45PM on a work night.  

In other totally great life-decision news, I still have an unopened bottle of 2021 Voo-Dew in my fridge that I never tried! It's over a year old at this point, but I'm sure it's probably fine, should I still review it?

One bad decision at a time, tonight, let's crack open the 2022 Voo-Dew and see what it's all about! 

Spooky Store-brand Smiles? - Halloween Potato Fries

Halloween Potato Fries - Lidl

A lot of Halloween products are sweet and candy-focused, so when I see a savory item, I jump on it. 

These were in Lidl's circular and even though the bag art seems a little store-brand and no-frills, how could I resist Jack-O-Lantern shaped potatoes? 

It's Frick'n Bats! - Reese's Puffs Bats

Reese's Bats Cereal - Gift

Another, normal, year-round product with a spOoky makeover. Now I got this as a gift, so part of me feels obligated to gush over it, and yes, it has great seasonal box art, but I'm going to take this opportunity to voice a (potentially) hot take instead. 

Reese's Puffs. Are Garbage. Thank you for coming to my TED talk.

Before avid Reese's-fans roast me, let me explain. 

I'm one of you! I love Reese's Cups, and mourn the loss of the really awesome Reese's Oreo collab. I may not be a peanut butter addict, BUT I do love peanut butter breakfast cereal, and when it comes to great peanut butter flavor, this ain't it.

Cre-E-epy Crawlers! Rather, CREEPY Crisps

Creepy Crisps - Gift

Sticking with savory snacking for a sec, I have these Limited Edition Creepy Crisps from The Good Crisp Company. 

I had never heard of this brand before, but at a glance, these seem to be...healthy Pringles? The little blurb on the can says that as a parent, they wanted to have a snack for their children that they felt good about, and that this year they "added a spooky twist." Safe to say, my assumptions were correct.

What's the spooky twist? Judging by the package, the chips inside are black-colored, but normal, original, potato-flavor. Will they actually look as black as they do on the tube? Will they still taste okay? Will they cause the same colorful gastrointestinal aftermath as other black products, like the Black Cherry Fanta slush or the Burger King HA1loween burger? We shall see! 

It Came From The Snack Aisle: Screamin' Sriracha Doritos

Screaming Sriracha Doritos - Target

Spicy switch-up with some spooky Sriracha Doritos! 

Sriracha has returned from the retired-flavor-graveyard, so it's not new-new, but like Dots, I never got around to reviewing it, so why not do it now when it's all dressed up for Halloween? 

Look at this bag! It packs a lot of playfulness into a simple layout. We have a flaming-red Dorito that casts a tall shadow in the shape of a bottle of sriracha. It's giving me looming Nosferatu and Bram Stoker's Dracula-vibes. Putting the final nail in the coffin, there's a classic horror-drip font, in bright green, with hints of texture. All of these factors come together to create a surprisingly sophisticated Halloween package. So unassuming, yet, so perfect. 

The 13 Posts of Halloween - Day 13, Ghost Pepper Whopper

Boo! After copious amounts of overtime at my day job, getting sick, getting better, and turning another year older, I'm back! Ready to make up for lost time with a new post every day from now until Halloween! (AND a special live stream with a friend of mine on her channel closer to the holiday! I'll keep you posted.) 

Let's start with a spicy, spooky, Halloween Burger from Burger King! 

I don't usually eat at Burger King, but when I do, it's because they have a Halloween themed burger. 

Snap, Cackle, Pop! - Ghoul-Aid Popping Candy

Ghoul-Aid Popping Candy - Dollar Tree

Back in 2015 I reviewed pouches of Ghoul-Aid, but those were blackberry flavored, so I think this product might be a in-name-only kind of deal. It says "Ghoul-Aid" and it's purple, but according to the illustration, it's generically berry flavored.

With Halloween items getting discounted and disappearing from shelves, let's see if it's worth scooping up.  

Ghoulishly Gourmet Marshmallows? (Okay, ghoulish is a stretch for sure, but they're definitely fall-themed)

Pumpkin Pie Smash-Mallows - JoAnn Fabrics

Happy Halloween! Like always, I bought way too much stuff and life got in the way of me reviewing it in a timely manner, so...I'm going to cram a bunch of Halloween reviews into the next few days. Get ready for multiple (breif-ish) posts and November-ween.  

Somehow I avoided Smash Mallow until now. Which is strange because I LOVE marshmallows. Toasted, plain, mixed into other sweets, even candy coated, like my beloved red-candy-coated marshmallows from Aunt Charlotte's. (A local confectionary. Everything they make is amazing.) 

These were on sale at JoAnn Fabrics, for like, 30% off, and even though I'm still experiencing taste-bud-burnout from my all-pumpkin-review-days, I figured there's no better time (or price) than now to give this particular flavor a try. 

It's finally time to start the Smash Mallow journey.

It's not a regular Red Vine, it's a cool-Red Vine - Candy Corn Red Vines

Candy Corn Flavored Red Vines - Michael's 

Kudos to Red Vines for taking a risk and releasing two different Halloween products, these Candy Corn Twists and these Ghoulish Grape Ropes (Which I couldn't find in-store.)

Grape ropes seem to be a solid, extruded, grape candy, which is a departure from their usual hollow straws. By comparison, this is just a flavor variant, but a fun seasonal one! (It's not a regular Red Vine, it's a cool-Red Vine.)

Crazy Coated Candy Corn Combinations!

Nerds Candy Corn - Dollar Tree 

It's officially spooky season and I am so excited! Time to pop on a horror movie (Trick r' Treat is currently on HBO) and crack into some candy corn, but not just any candy corn, Nerds Candy Corn. 

These Vampires, Suck - Hershey's Vampire Kisses

Vampire Kisses- CVS 

Happy Friday the 13th to you all! I should probably celebrate by watching some Jason movies, but he's never been my favorite. I'm more of a Nightmare on Elm Street kind of girl. So, even though Freddy vs. Jason was pretty much garbage, I think it's what I'll be watching tonight, and along with my bowl of popcorn I'll be chowing down on discounted Halloween Candy, like these Vampire Kisses!  

Since I really liked the strawberry-filled Ghirardelli squares that are only available on Valentine's Day, I thought this might be a Hershey equivalent I could snack on in the meantime. I wasn't expecting much at all, just Hershey's quality chocolate kisses with a strawberry center. You know, like they promised. 

Caramel Pumpkin Lay's (I Think?)

Caramel Pumpkin Chips - Hung Vuong Market

Halloween may be over, but we're not through with pumpkin-season yet. Although I pretty much ruined all things pumpkin related for myself, forever, I still can't resist new and wacky items, like these chips. 

I found them all alone in the snacking aisle with little to no English, so all I had to go on was a translated ingredient label, and the imagery, which made it seem like these were some kind of sweet caramel and pumpkin flavored chip, and I figured...why not give it a try?

You can check out the video review above, or keep reading for a fully written post and close-up photos.  

Turns Out I'm 100% That Witch - Witch's Brew Kit-Kats

Witch's  Brew Kit-Kats - CVS

Where are all the ghoulish goods? I feel like I usually have a decent pile of new Halloween-y treats to review each year, but this time around I only have these Kit-Kats, and the Franken-cup Reeses. (Which are arguably just the same as normal Reese's anyway.) Other than these two, it's just a sea of seasonal repeats. 

Other brands may be lacking the spooky spirit, but Kit-Kat is picking up the slack! For fall 2020 they've released normal Kit-Kat bars in Halloween packaging, white-chocolate orange-colored bars, pumpkin pie flavored bars, glow in the dark wrappers, AND these Halloween-specific Witch's Brew ones. While most of them are just re-packagings/coloring of year-round goodies, I still appreciate the effort. Let's dig in!

The Power of VOODEW 2, Electric-Boogaloo

VooDew 2 - 7-Eleven

Mountain Dew is keeping the Halloween spirit alive with their second Halloween Mystery Flavor, MTN DEW VOO-DEW TWO (electric Boogaloo), and it's just what the Witch-Doctor ordered. (And it's a lot of fun to say out loud.)

I was a huge fan of last year's version. Everything from the label design to the flavor itself was so well done, and now it's back again, this time with a new mystery to solve.

Halloween-Themed Fruit Roll-Ups for Dinner

Franken Berry and Boo Berry Fruit Roll-Ups  - CVS

I'm alive! My day job opened it's doors a few weeks ago, and although things aren't quite the same as they once were, I'm adjusting to my "new normal," rather well.  

During my quarantine at home I made tons of fancy meals, 7 loaves of bread, at least a dozen batches of cookies, 3 pot roasts, and a lackluster copycat recipe of Auntie Anne's cinnamon sugar pretzels. Plus, I wrote, like, two food reviews. Whoops.

I thought having all that time at home would have allowed me to be more productive on this blog, but when everyone was trying to work from home, and do their college courses/exams from home, and the dogs were antagonized by the insane amount of delivery men outside...I had a really hard time sitting down and thinking clearly. I baked, wrangled the dogs, or did laundry and stuff around the house instead. Like cleaning out our snack cabinets, and low and behold, the very last of the Halloween-themed Fruit Roll-ups were there, waiting to be uncovered. 

Let's eat them for dinner.