Wednesday, March 20, 2019

Kari Poké! - Confessions of a Pokemon Hoarder

Kari Pori Pokémon Candy Sticks - Empty Boxes Being Sold HERE on eBay
Confession time, I haven't played a Pokémon game since the original Gold and Silver on Gameboy Color. Well, I have played a bit of Pokémon Stadium (love those mini games) and Pokkén, but I don't think those really count. 
I still consider myself a fan of the franchise, and I keep up with all the new Pokémon being released, but I just don't have time to play games like I used to. In spite of my lack of integration in the bread and butter of the fan-base, I still buy tons of random Pokémon merch! I have all of these boxes you see above, some regrettable gum that came with collectible stickers (as seen on my Instagram), some laser cut Pokémon seaweed sheets, and a box of pouches containing (what I believe to be) children's curry in my pantry. I just can't help myself. I see that sweet little electric rat's face and into my cart it goes. (I'm also hype for Detective Deadpool Pikachu.)  
I have a lot of Pokémon stuff piled up in my home...and I am running out of places to put it. A lot of it sits forgotten in bins that never see the light of day, and that is a shame. So, to fix all that, and to get hype for the upcoming movie, I decided to review it all and get rid of it. Time to Marie Kondo this b*tch! But...in true hoarder fashion, I don't want to just get rid of it all, instead I'll be putting all the packaging up on eBay so it'll hopefully find a new, loving, home where it can be displayed proudly. If that fails...I guess it'll go in the recycling bin, The circle of Poke-life and all that, but at least I tried!~
First up, these Kari Pori sticks. The candy is expired, but I'm going to review it anyway! 

We all know I bought these for the boxes, and I totally did, but it was a low-risk impulse buy because I'm already familiar with Kari Pori sticks. They were one of my OG food reviews back in 2013
Kabaya really crammed a ton of Pokémon onto each tiny box. We have Pokémon on the front, those same Pokémon on the tops of the boxes, different Pokémon on the back, even more Pokémon and characters on the tiny inside flaps! 
So the boxes are really unique, but the candy inside? Not so much. Each box has the same exact candy inside and there are only two flavors, orange and grape. Those aren't bad flavors, or a bad combination, but I would have liked a tiny bit of variety. (Then again, most people aren't buying 6 boxes in one shot. It's not Kabaya's fault that I'm a food hoarder.) 
Inside each box are several sticks, the purple wrappers are grape candy, and the orange are, well, orange. Duh. The individual wrappers seem to have some Pokémon puzzles and games, like spot the difference and the like on them, which is cute, but I can't read any of it, so any puns or cleverness is truly lost on me but I still enjoy the mazes and visual puzzles.
We finally get to the candy! So, how do these tiny expired candy sticks taste?  
Surprisingly fresh! Kari Pori are light, crunchy, candy sticks with a hint of soda-like fizz. Kind of like little tubes of edible fiberglass. (Which was an interesting description to type, but it's spot-on accurate as far as texture is concerned.) These packages are stamped with 2015 and 2016, so they're old, but you'd never guess it by the texture if the candy inside. (I mean, does candy ever really expire? YES. But these were still good.)
Grape (Purple) - It has a light concord grape flavoring with a decent amount of tanginess and some added soda-fizziness. Thanks to it's light texture and effervescent core, this easily reads as a grape soda flavored candy, but the grape flavoring takes a backseat to the overall tanginess and it's more authentic than more American grape sodas. This is more Welch's grape Jelly meets Sprite than modern day grape soda, and I'm okay with that. I found this to be very snackable and quite refreshing. 
Orange (Orange) - Again, the fruity flavoring takes a bit of a backseat to the overall soda-aspect of the candy, but the orange is significantly bolder than the grape. After the fizziness winds down you get a bright citrus flavoring similar to a classic orange soda. It's light, crispy, and impressively authentic. Porbably one of the best orange soda themes candies I've ever had in regards to authenticity. 
This is a rare case of a novelty product that manages to taste as great as it looks. DBZ products should take note. This is how it's done! 
So, if you see any Kabaya Kari Pori sticks around, I highly recommend giving them a chance. I haven't been disappointed by one yet!  
Also, just in case anyone here is interested, I am selling these empty boxes and additional Pokémon stickers HERE on eBay. I love how these boxes look, and they make for a really cute display, but I just don't have the space anymore so I rather they go to a happy home. 
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