Friday, January 27, 2023

Cool Ranch 2: Electric Boogaloo (Tangy Ranch Doritos)


Tangy Ranch Doritos are back!

I missed out on these the first time around, but I was able to grab this bag at Walmart and I'm super stoked. Sure, I probably could have bought them online for whatever marked up price they were going for, but due to all the backlogging that tends to happen around here I limit myself to in-person purchases when I can. So they came, and went, and I was Tangy-Ranch-less. 

Not this time!

Each flavor has their own distinct bag color, and this time around it's a bright teal with magenta accents. The rest of the layout is bold and graphic, something Dorito's has been leaning into for a while, and it's working, but I can't get over the colors. It feels Retro, kind of like a 1980's track suit, but the particular shades are so vibrant that they also feel modern and appropriate for the 2020's. In the end, it's just another Dorito's bag, but I really can't stop looking at it, and it stands out like a neon sign from the top of my fridge where all my other junkfood lives. 


When I saw the name, I thought these would be a ramped up version of Cool Ranch. Like, the super-seasoned pieces you'll find in a bag of Chex Mix, but Dorito-ified. So I had high hopes. 

I opened it up. and they do smell similar to classic Cool Ranch Doritos. It's that zesty ranch aroma we all know and love, but there is something different about it that lives up to the "Tangy" descriptor. It comes across as bolder, a little brighter, and maybe a hint of dill? Maybe herb-heavy is the better way to describe it.

Grabbing a chip, it looks pretty normal. A decent amount of seasoning flecks, maybe slightly more yellow-colored overall than usual, but fairly innocuous.

I took a bite and...I was pretty underwhelmed. 

These were definitely tangier than usual, and a little "spicy," but not in the way that I had hoped. Have you ever gotten a cheap slice of pizza on the boardwalk? You go to the seasoning station and add garlic powder to give it a little life, only for the cap to fall off covering your already mediocre pizza slice in way more garlic than you anticipated, but you solider-on. You scrape off what you can and go for it, but there is so much garlic that it made the pizza feel like it was nearly spicy. Not an improvement, but tolerable. 


That is what this is like. This is like, someone took Cool Ranch Doritos, amped up the sour cream and butter milk creaminess, and added a cap's-off amount of dry garlic powder.

It's far from inedible, and definitely still enjoyable, but not at all what I had hoped it would be. 

There are a few chips in the bag with heavier seasoning (lots more flecks), and those take on a more herby ranch flavor that I prefer. But they don't make up the majority of the bag. 

I like these, and they're definitely different from the normal Cool Ranch flavor available year-round, but it wasn't the snack I wanted it to be. 

Finishing this bag will be no problem, they're still good, but if these make another rotation around the foodie-sun and come back again, I won't go out of my way searching for another bag. It's still the OG version for me. 


Fans of this would also like:
 These other Doritos flavors: Cracked pepper and chicken, 7-Eleven Doritos Loaded, Poppin' Jalapeno, Screamin' Sriracha, or Spicy Sweet Chili

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